


detention

by chimeras



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: M/M, Stoner Richie, bad boy richie, bill and mike had a connection, detention fic, good-boy eddie, inspired by the breakfast club, so deal with it, yet nobody talks about it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-17
Updated: 2020-01-23
Packaged: 2020-10-20 08:42:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20672504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chimeras/pseuds/chimeras
Summary: After Eddie, the semi-popular straight A student, gets detention, he gets to really meet the infamous Richie: the school’s most care-free stoner boy who couldn't care less about the world. The two find themselves having more of a connection than they think, but nobody could ever know.





	1. the princess

“I cannot believe they gave you three days of detention for this.” Stan said. Him, Ben and Eddie walked through the halls after the school day had ended. Stan and Ben had stayed to wait for Eddie as the principal determined Eddie’s sentence. The reason for Eddie’s punishment was something he both wanted to shout from the rooftops and keep quiet between him and his friends.

“I don’t think you really deserve three whole days of after school detention. How long do those last anyways?” Ben asked. If he was being honest, Eddie didn’t really know. Being a good-boy straight A student, he had never even thought of detention, let alone the details about it. The principal had said it was only a few hours after school for the next three days, starting tomorrow after last period.

He had never really talked to any of the kids who were known to get detention. The rebels, the care-less and failing students, stoners and class skipping kids. The criminals. People Eddie had nightmares about interacting with. He almost feared having to spend two or three hours with them for the next three days. He wondered what they did in there, what they said and acted like in the last room of the 300’s wing. He got chills thinking about what they would say to him when he walked in on the Wednesday afternoon. What they would do to him the next three days.

“I don’t think I deserve it either, but I couldn’t have argued with the principal more than my mother did. I can only imagine the ass-whooping I’ll be getting when I walk through that door when I get home.” Eddie told his friends. Stan let out a nervous laugh. Ben let out a sigh.

“I’m scared for you, buddy.” Ben told him.

Ben Hanscom and Stanley Uris were Eddie’s best friends, along with Mike Hanlon. Ever since kindergarten, him and Ben were the best of friends. They shared the same interests, which included writing and studying. Pretty boring, but they confided in each other during any hard time. Like when Eddie’s mother yapped away about some disease he might have, or when Ben was freaking out about some new information he had discovered about the history of their very own hometown of Derry, Maine.

When 2nd grade rolled around, Stanley Uris moved into their school. After being bullied for his religion at his last school, his parents decided to put him in a different school environment. The plan back-fired as Stanley was just bullied even harsher by older kids. But it was too late for his parents to find another school, and too late for them to move to another town in the state. However, he quickly made friends with Ben and Eddie, as they were some of the few people who didn’t give a damn what he believed in.

The next year, 3rd grade, they became friends with Mike Hanlon. After hearing about the fire that killed his family, they tried their best to show their support for him. He wound up becoming close with them, and thus their friend group was complete.

The four friends were closer than ever, always meeting up to do homework together or study for any test or quiz they had that week. To others it may seem boring, but they formed a bond like no other. As said before, the four grew close enough to share their deepest fears and darkest secrets with each other, knowing they wouldn’t be judged by one another for anything they shared. By the time middle school rolled around, they were absolutely inseparable.

But, even so, Eddie had felt pretty alone in getting detention. He and his friends had never got into trouble. They were the nerds, the pussies, the good boys of their school. When Eddie did what he did, half the grade didn’t even believe it happened until they saw the videos. Eddie didn’t even think he had the physical (or mental) strength to do what he did. Yet, here he was, walking the empty halls with two of his three friends, internally screaming about his punishment for his actions. But he had no choice but to accept his fate.

When him and the other two boys arrived outside the building, they already saw Mike’s car pulled up to the front of the school. He rolled down the window to talk to them.

“Hop in, losers.” He spoke, laughing. Ben and Stan let out soft scoffed out laughs. But Eddie just laughed nervously, and it was obvious to the other boys. Eddie sat in the front and quickly snapped on his seatbelt. They started to drive away from the school, which now terrified the newfound “criminal”.

His friends must’ve noticed how tense he was as they offered to take him to get one of his favorite comfort foods: ice cream. Mike drove over to Sundaes, the local ice cream shop that was Eddie’s favorite place to go. He walked in and got himself a waffle cone filled with vanilla bean ice cream. He sat on the red painted bench around the other side of the store. His friends had definitely picked up on his nervousness and need to get some fresh air- alone. They stayed in the car and ate this ice cream while chatting about any and everything.

Eddie sat and thought about his entire life behind him while staring at the trees not too far in front of him. He thought about what his mother would say when he got home, what she would do when seeing his red and slightly bruised knuckles on his right hand. _She’s gonna freak_, he thought. He wasn’t wrong.

But most of all, he thought about his detention sentence. He knew exactly who he’d see there. Beverly Marsh- known for not giving shit about hurting the people who hurt her. Bill Denbrough- known for smoking whenever and wherever he wanted, making snarky remarks, along with his stutter. As fearful as he could be, his stutter held him back from doing any serious damage to those he was bitchy to.

But worst of all, Richie Tozier- known for not giving two shits about anything. Skipping class was almost a daily ritual for him. And if he was in class, he was either sleeping or doodling in his notebook where he was supposed to be taking notes. When he wasn’t in class, he was almost always with Bill, and more often than not with Beverly, smoking either in the courtyard, behind/under the bleachers, or in the back of the junior parking lot. He was a well known pot-head. He also typically beat up whoever he wanted, and often for little reasons.

Eddie questioned why he did any of this. He thought of the potential this kid had to succeed, the rumors about his high SAT scores. Low average or not, he had a feeling Richie was smarter than he led on to be. But he would never say anything to anyone about it. He constantly shit on Richie and his friends, always talking about how disgusting it was that he didn’t care about anything.

He wondered what Richie had planned to do after school. He didn’t have the grades to go anywhere but a community college, if he were to even go to college. Maybe he’d just get a shitty fast-food job- flipping burgers for a living. I mean, someone has to flip those burgers. He admired the people working at fast food places. However, he’d never drive through one to get food. He was a regular health nut- always worrying about any disease he had or could have, or worse, contract from someone else. But none of this _really_ mattered. What mattered was his constant racing thoughts about whatever flooded his mind in the moment.

And in this particular, it was his fear of what Richie had in store for him tomorrow afternoon.


	2. the criminal

Richie “Trashmouth” Tozier was the worst student at his school. He skipped classes to smoke with his friends, slept when he was in class, was failing most of his classes, and did whatever he wanted all the time. He stole things, hurt people, and found pleasure in doing the opposite of what he was told. He was mostly known for his snarky remarks and sassy comments to anyone whenever he pleased. He was a boomer’s worst nightmare.

Today, he found himself getting stuck in detention for the billionth time this year alone. One of the gym teachers found him and Bill Denbrough (also known as “Stuttering Bill”) under the bleachers smoking bud from his new pipe. He called it his “pussy pipe” as it was molded into a naked woman and when you hit it you looked like you were eating her out. He lit the weed and took a giant hit, so big you could see the smoke going through the bleachers. Which is exactly how they got caught. The gym teacher that had brought his class outside saw the smoke coming through the middle of the bleachers and went behind to see what it was, and thus the boys were busted.

For whatever reason, Beverly Marsh was also attending detention that day. After Greta mumbled and called her Beaver-ly for the first time since Bev smacked her in the face, she took the girls milk carton and spilled the entire thing over her head before throwing the carton so hard it left a bruise on the bully’s head. But Greta being the popular it-girl of the grade, she got away with being a bitch while Beverly had to suffer five days of detention.

The three students all knew they would always see each other in after-school detention as they were all the same type of troublemaking students. None of them cared about anything, nor did their family.

When Richie was younger, he was best friends with his parents. He was a good kid, played on the playground, was friendly with his peers. When he hit fourth grade, things took a turn. He was often distracted in class, fidgety, a mild mood swings. His parents assumed it was just ADHD or something he would grow out of in a few years. They were definitely and completely wrong.

By seventh grade, Richie was driving everyone insane. He went through periods of feeling like he was the best human to ever walk the earth, and others feeling like he was the biggest waste of space. He went through periods of starting projects and spending money and rearranging the entire house, and then not leaving his bed and barely eating or showering.

It wasn’t until _the incident_ before his parents suspected something might be seriously wrong. But being super religious and spiritual, they refused to get him the treatment he truly needed and instead prayed for him and screamed at him until he finally broke. After that, his life had taken a turn for the worse.

By freshman year of high school, he decided to rebel against the world. He started skipping, smoking, sleeping in class, and hurting not only himself, but now others, verbally and physically. Hurting on the inside was too much for him, so he figured the only solution was pushing it onto others. He didn’t know what it was, mainly because his parents refused to believe it was anything other than teenage hormonal mood swings.

Tuesday, after school, Richie was found in his natural habitat: room 205. The detention room. Richie has detention dates stacked up by the dozens, for reasons he had probably forgotten by now. He walked in to see none other than Bill Denbrough, aka “Stuttering Bill”, aka his one of two best friends.

Bill Denbrough was someone you only messed with in private. He was easy to make fun of because of what he was known for most- his stutter. He’s had it since he was younger, and it was getting better as he grew. Until his younger brother died. People think it was some sort of animal attack when he went out to play in the rain, but nobody knows what _really_ happened. When one of the neighbors found him, he was missing some limbs and fingers. He obviously bled out from that, and Bill and his family weren’t the same after that. His mother barely spoke to him, let alone left the house. His dad became slightly abusive and a giant asshole. This caused Bill to rebel against everyone. Ever since that happened, his stutter weakened but still existed and his anger and depression grew more and more as the years went by.

In sixth grade, after the death of his brother Georgie, Bill became quiet and almost scary. When Richie became the same way in eighth grade, they became apart of the same friend group- if you considered a two person friendship a group. That two-person group became three people when they met Beverly Marsh, who often just went by Bev.

Beverly “Bev” Marsh was a snarky yet reserved girl from the start. She never bothered anyone, never did anything, nor got into any trouble. But as her father grew more and more disgustingly abusive, she became more and more angry at the world. She stop caring about smoking in school and getting caught. That’s when she met Richie and Bill.

She herself had decided in a change of scene- she typically smoked in the bathroom but decided to get some fresh air one day. She walked under the bleachers and lit a cigarette before the two boys walked in on her. She turned and gasped, almost choking on smoke. She first slightly feared they would tell someone, until they pulled out the infamous pussy pipe and started smoking themselves. They gave her a few hits and all got high before some random gym class rat ratted them out. That lead to their own tradition and/or ritual: after-school detention.

After she started caring even less about anything, she started to interact with the people who hurt her most- like Greta. Greta was the biggest bitch Bev had ever met. She created the nickname “Beaver-ly” in seventh grade after accidentally tripping over Bev’s foot. Even if it was her own fault, Greta still insisted on putting the blame onto other people. “Other people” being Beverly.

The three weren’t the type to openly share their feelings, but if the time came they always knew the others would be there. Not giving a shit about anything had its perks- like sneaking out to Bill’s house at 3am when he was having night terrors about his brother, or hiding Beverly when she needed a break from her father. Or skipping class to bring Richie food and keep him in check during an _episode_.

Richie walked into the classroom, threw his bag onto the floor next to a desk, and sat down next to Bill.

“What’s it today, R-R-Richie?” Bill said, slighting picking up his head to look at his friend.

“You think I know? I stopped paying attention to why I was here a while ago. What about you?”

“I think this time is from J-Jackman seeing our smoke through the b-b-bleachers.” He said, looking and sounding pissed off. If he was stuttering this much, he was sober. And when he was sober, he was pissy. But he knew if he smoked in the bathroom he would get caught before a second hit. Before Richie could respond, the door swung open and Bev walked in. Her hair was short and messily chopped off.

“Hey red-head, what’s with the lack of hair?” Richie laughed, adjusting his thick-rimmed glasses.

“Yeah I-I remember more hair th-this morning.” Bill laughed along with the other boy.

“I chopped it off during seventh. There’s hair all over the girls room in the 600s wing.”

“Why go shorter?” Bill asked. They could figure out why, but wouldn’t say it.

“Got bored of it. Needed a change.” She shrugged, saying this like it was nothing.

They all often did things like this. Randomly doing something random, no matter how durastic the change was. Like when Richie tried wearing contacts for a week before getting too lazy to keep putting them in every morning, or when Bill tried staying mute to hide his stutter, which lasted all of half a school day. Richie wasn’t called Trashmouth for nothing- that kid could get anyone to start talking.

“Speaking of a change, guess who I saw in the office while walking here.” Bev said, more like a statement than a question. “Eddie Kaspbrak.”

Bill looked like a deer in headlights. Richie scoffed.

“Probably starting a new fundraiser to save trees or something.” Richie rolled his eyes.

“I don’t th-think that’s what a fundraiser is. W-W-Wouldn’t that be a charity?” Bill asked. Bev laughed at the two boys stupidity.

“He didn’t look too thrilled, and neither did his synched-pussy friends who were standing outside.” She said, taking a quick seat next to the boys. “I heard he punched a kid.”

Bill picked up his head and sat upright. “He w-what?”

“It’s definitely a lie, little uptight Kaspbrak would never. I bet he cries at the thought of rough knuckles.” Richie spat out.

“I don’t know man, I thought I saw a fight in the courtyard earlier. Maybe the kid’s got more rage than we thought.” She smiled almost suspiciously. “Rumors say he knocked the kid down.”

“N-N-Now THAT is a-a sight I would like to s-s-see.” Bill stammered out. His stutter either got better or worse with a rush of emotions.

“Something we’d all like to see, like pigs flying.” Richie said bitterly.

He knew there was no way in hell little Eddie would be capable of punching someone, let alone knocking them clean. But even he had to admit, it would be hilarious to see him in there, tight-panties, straight-A, daily vitamin eater, health conscious, class note taker, little bitch boy, Eddie Kaspbrak, in a little shithole of an after school activity.

And hilarious it would be.


	3. room 205, day 1

The loud ringing from the bell had never gave Eddie the chills, but on this wednesday afternoon, it scared the shit out of him. He knew what was coming next. He didn’t want to go, dread filled his entire body as he grabbed his backpack and slowly left the classroom. He had roughly fifteen minutes to get to room 205, and before he reached the end of the hall his friends were already ready to walk him there.

They all already knew he was scared shitless about this. They didn’t think it was as serious as he was making it, but the germs that lied on those trouble-making rats made him shiver with disgust. If anything, he had his fanny pack filled with everything he needed, including hand sanitizer. He wasn’t terrified of the kids in there- maybe a little spooked, but not anxiety ridden over them -the only thing giving him anxiety was fear that this would affect his acceptance rates for college. The principal had ensured this wouldn’t be on his record, but Eddie still feared he would change his mind.

“Relax, Eddie. It’s only three days, and it’s not going on your permanent record. You’ll be fine.” Stan reassured him.

He didn’t feel too reassured.

“Well I don’t _feel_ fine.” Eddie muttered.

“Well if you wanna come over after, you’re totally welcome.” Ben told him.

“There’s no way my mother is letting me out of the house for at least the next eight years.” He said, getting more upset and angry with every word.

They finally reached the room, and Eddie felt gross. Gross from the kids in there, gross thinking about what his mom would do when he got home, _She’s gonna take me to the hospital to get some deep clean-power wash,_ he thought. He hated having to be here. Yet he still debates whether he regrets what he did. He loved doing it. It felt amazing. The _power_ he felt when he did what he did, something people didn’t do to who he did it to.

Eddie checked the time on his phone. He was 10 minutes earlier than he had to be, but that was him.

“Well, we’ll see you on the other side.” Ben said. Stan back-handed his stomach before Ben let out a soft _”ow”_. He looked dumbfounded.

“Sorry. See you tomorrow.” Ben said.

“And call us if you need anything.” Mike added as they turned around and started walking away.

Eddie let out a soft but sad sigh. He leaned against the wall and looked at his phone. It was almost as if he was looking for something to do, to distract himself or procrastinate walking in. He was making this a bigger deal than it was. Well, in anyone else’s eyes he was, but in his eyes it was one of the worst things that could ever happen to him. Imagining this affecting his chances of getting into a good college, or worse- his reputation, scared the life out of him. Eddie enjoyed being one of the well-known smart kids. Nobody messed with him too much like its stereotyped in movies. In movies, it was always the nerds that the bullies were after. But in his school, no one was safe. So there were the people, and then the bullies. Besides the asshole bullies, there were cliques deeper within the school population. Eddie and his friends may have been seen as losers, but being as smart and humble as they were, people respected them. People, excluding kids like Henry Bowers, who messed with him and pretty much everyone else all day, every day.

Eddie checked the time. He had spent all of one minute thinking about literally everything in space and time. Opening the door, he let out another sigh and rolled his eyes. He walked in to see Bill Denbrough with his head down on the desk. Eddie thought the accidental bang of the closing door would’ve alarmed him, but he didn’t move in the slightest. Eddie put his bag by the desk closest to the door and sat down. He wasn’t sure what he was and wasn’t allowed to do, so he just sat and let his mind wander around the room. He stared at the clock.

_2:23._ He was still too early, detention didn’t really start for another seven minutes.

He stared at the clock for another five minutes. He turned to look at other random things in the classroom, like posters and hung up projects. But for the most part, he stared at the clock. _It’s only one hour_ he reassured himself, _it’ll be done before you know it_. After those five minutes passed, the door swung open again and in walked Beverly Marsh and worse; Richie Tozier.

“Oh shit- no fucking way.” Richie said with a loud scoff.

“I told you, when will you realize I’m the smart one of the group.” Bev said.

Richie walked over to Bill’s desk and slammed his hands down on it. Bill’s head shot up.

“What the fuck man?” He said. _He’s definitely stoned,_ Eddie thought. But he wasn’t _really_ stoned, just a little out of it. A few hits from his pipe and he could sleep for days. “I was trying to f-f-fucking sleep.”

“Well I’m pretty sure that’s against the rules, and we can’t let poor old Kaspbrak seeing you breaking the rules. Isn’t that right, Eds?” Richie said with a dirty grin on his face. Richie calling him “Eds” make him want to deck him in that very moment, but he kept his cool and stared at the clock.

When the clock hit 2:30, a teacher walked in to supervise the delinquants. However, she was consumed in work and didn’t really care what they did.

“Aw, don’t b-bother the kid, Rich. I bet h-h-he’s here for some p-p-p-pussy reason anyways.” Bill stammered out. He put his dead down again, his mouth being covered by his arm now.

“What _did_ you do to land your ass in here?” Richie said, taking a seat next to the anxious boy.

“It’s none of your business.” He said flatly. Bev laughed under her breath.

“Rumors say you clocked someone. Any comments?” She said, leaning back in her desk.

“It’s none of your business.” He repeated. He adjusted his perfect posture in the desk and let out another small sigh. “And even if I did, why would you care?”

“Well, little goody-two-shoes Eddie Kaspbrak is not someone we’d expect to be knocking people around.” Richie said. Eddie looked at his scabbed and slightly bruised knuckles under the desk and felt gross again. Richie glared at him for a second before sitting down in the seat next to him. Eddie quickly crossed his arms again, shoving his hands in his armpits and looked down at his desk.

It fell silent for a minute, an almost awkward silence, before Bill spoke: “Dude, I’m so f-fucking tired.”

“I felt that, man.” Bev said, kicking her feet up on the desk. “How long do we have left?”

Richie turned on his phone. “Exactly an hour from right now.” He said, sinking into his seat.

Bev let out a groan and dropped her head on the desk. The three detention regulars were all strung out from absolutely nothing. They didn’t do any school work, didn’t have jobs, nothing. Eddie thought about how late they stayed up, plus the amount of weed they smoke. Then he remembered how tired they were. _It kind of makes sense._ He wondered what Richie did at 3am. Maybe he didn’t smoke. _Doubtful,_ Eddie thought.

The four kids sat in silence for ten minutes. It was awkward, and frankly annoying. So Eddie spoke up.

“Why are you guys here?” He asked. Maybe he knew why, or _thought_ he knew why.

“I poured milk on Greta’s head.” Bev said, laughing. Bill and Richie laughed under their breaths.

“I mean, the b-bitch deserves it.” Bill said, still laughing. He put his mouth by the sleeve of his green and black checkered flannel. Eddie didn’t know what he was doing, but Richie and Bev definitely did. Suddenly a faint puff of smoke flowed out of his mouth as he laughed. Bev and Richie laughed harder. “AM I WRONG?” He said louder, laughing even more. Eddie sat there, feeling weird. It was almost as if he _wanted_ to laugh, but he wouldn’t let them know it.

“I don’t even remember why I’m here!” Richie said. They were practically hyperventilating from laughing so hard. Eddie had on a small smile but turned it back to a frown as soon as he realized what he was doing. The teacher looked up.

“Keep it down.” She said flatly. They quieted they’re suffocating laughs.

“I think it’s when we smoked bud under the bleachers on monday.” Bill said. _What happened to his stutter?_ Eddie questioned in his thoughts.

Eddie had a lot of questions in his mind right now. One being, _what the fuck is going on right now,_ while watching the three others laughing their asses off. Another being, _is this really happening right now? Is this real?_ It wasn’t a lie. He really questioned how he ended up here. Well, _he knew how he ended up here,_ but he didn’t like thinking about it. Again, he was questioning if he regret what he did.

“So, how about you Eddie boy? What did _you_ do to end up here?” Richie said, a huge grin on his face while he laughed through the whole sentence. The three others stared at him, big smiles on their faces while they silently laughed waiting for his response.

“I told you before, it’s not your business.” He said flatly. He almost wanted to tell them. As much as he wanted to protect his goody two-shoes reputation, being thought of as “cool” was something he wasn’t opposed to.

“Come _onnnnn_ man, just tell us. It’s a safe space!” Bill said, sarcastically and still giggling. Eddie still sat silent.

The rest of the hour was this. Them laughing, stoned out of their minds and sneakily passing around Bill’s dab pen. Meanwhile, Eddie sat there, feeling lonely in a room where he was around other people. He felt like this most of the time. As high-up as he saw himself, he still felt that ugly loneliness all the time. Literally, _all the time._ Even sitting in his room, friends by his side, even when they talked about their feelings for hours all night, he still felt alone. And he couldn’t explain it if he wanted to.

And he _really wanted to._


	4. coffee, cigarettes, and a ride home

It’s been twenty-five minutes already, and Eddie felt like he was about to die just from boredom alone. _2:55_ the clock read, and Eddie had just enough of the silence. Yesterday, they were laughing and talking and it was ok for a bit. But this awkward silence was insane. It was like they had nothing to talk about. They all knew why they were there, there was no use going through it again. Except Eddie. Well, he knew why he was there, but the others didn’t. He was still unsure if we wanted them to know. But he would do anything to get rid of this disgusting silence-

“It’s true. I did it.” He said, quietly. They all perked their heads up.

“What?” Bill said, eyes barely open.

“I did it. The rumors going around. They’re true.” He said, keeping his eyes focussed on the desk he was sitting in.

“And what rumors are true exactly?” Bev asked with a grin. She obviously knew, but she wanted to hear him say it. Not only because she wanted to prove Richie wrong, but because she was genuinely still a bit surprised and intrigued.

Eddie let out a sigh. “I punched him. Bowers, I punched bowers. In the face.” He said, still keeping his eyes in place. The others let out impressed scoffs, mouths opened in smiles. Bev was laughing, Bill looked like he was searching for absolutely anything to say, and Richie sat there, dumbfounded.

“Why?” Bill finally spit out.

“Why not?” Bev said, still laughing.

“N-No, I mean what did he do th-this time? L-Like what h-h-happened, w-why did you do it?” Bill said. It must have sobered him up a bit, all the rush of excitement and intrigue.

“I don’t know.” Eddie said, slowly looking at him. But he was lying. He absolutely knew why. But he wasn’t going to embarrass anyone there.

“Fuck you mean you _don’t know_? Thats some bullshit right there.” Richie said.

“Well maybe I just don’t wanna talk about it, ever think of that one genius?” Eddie replied.

After that, they were silent again. Bill put half his face tucked in his folded arms on the desk. Beverly let out a half-sigh half-raspberry and put her feet up on the desk. Richie sunk back in his seat and annoyingly tapped his pencil on the desk. It was silent besides the tapping, until a phone started ringing. All four students checked their phones but none of them were getting calls. Then Ms.Lasko, the teacher watching over the kids, picked up her phone.

_”Yes… Ok, and?...Oh wow… yes I’ll come as soon as I can… Ok, see you soon, bye.”_ She spoke. She shut her phone off and stood up. “I have to leave, I’m going to find another teacher to come now but I have to leave you kids alone for a bit. Can I promise you won’t misbehave?”

The four kids nodded. Ms.Lasko grabbed her bags and quickly and left the room. The three _actual_ delinquants started smiling and laughing as the door shut behind the teacher. Bill pulled out a dab pen and took a long hit. Eddie’s eyes grew wide with fear.

“What are you doing?! It’s like you’re trying to get more days here.” He said confused and angry.

“What? It’s not like anyone’s in here besides us, and there’s only cameras in the hallway.” He said, smoke blowing out of his smiling mouth. He leaned over and passed it to Richie who also took a big hit. He coughed a few times and smoke blew out of his mouth in big clouds. He reached over Eddie and handed it to Bev. She took a few small hits so she wouldn’t choke like Richie did. She then tossed it back to Richie who was signalling her to give it back. He then extended his arm out to Eddie.

“Wanna try?” He asked. Eddie looked at the device with fear, then back up at Richie.

“Absolutely not. Get that thing away from me.” Eddie said, leaning away from it. Richie leaned over more to shove it in his face, and Eddie started breathing heavily.

“I said no, Richie.” He said sternly. Richie kept persisting, and then the others joined in.

_”Come on Eds, take a hit”... “One hit isn’t gonna kill you”... “It’s fun, you’ll love it, promise”..._

Their voices were clouding Eddie’s head, until he jumped out of his seat and looked at them.

“I said no! And no means no, so no, I don’t want to take a hit of your drugs because I don’t enjoy completely fucking up my body. I know you guys don’t care, but I do, so can you respect that?” He was yelling. He unzipped his fanny pack and pulled out his inhaler, shaking it a few times before taking a hit from it. “This are the drugs I get to take, so keep that disgusting mind ruining shit away from me!” He said. The kids looked at him, small grins and wide eyes displayed on their faces.

“Damn, finally h-h-he speaks up.” Bill said. “T-Take a seat, man. You don’t h-have to try it. Not _now_, a-at least.”

Eddie took a breath and sat back down, letting out a big sigh and took another hit from his inhaler.

Soon enough, the three stoners were stoned and laughing like crazy. After about ten minutes, another teacher walked in and sat down. She was stricter. She made them sit in absolute silence, perfect posture, and either do homework or sit quietly.

* * *

As soon as the block hit 3:30, Bill jumped out of his seat and left as soon as he could. Bev messily threw everything back into her bag and left just as quick. Richie slowly broke out of the leaned back position he had been sitting in for the forty-five minutes and stood up.

“Need a ride?” He asked. Eddie was confused, and it was definitely noticeable in his face. Yet, he slowly nodded and stood up.

The two boys walked down the hall together in silence before walking out the front doors. Eddie followed a step behind Richie as they walked through the junior parking lot, not even knowing Richie could drive. When they reached his car, it was a 1994 Honda Accord and not in the best shape. Eddie climbed into the passenger's seat and instantly cringed at the strong smell of weed and cigarettes.

“What the hell do you do in this car?” Eddie said, disgust still plastered on his face.

“Smoke and drive, baby.” Richie replied. He took a juul out of his pocket and took a long hit as he put the keys into the slot and started the car. He wiped the wheel around and started driving away. Eddie grabbed the handle above the car door and gripped it tightly. Richie was a horrible driver.

“How did you even pass your drivers test? I feel like my soul is leaving my body with every turn you make.” Eddie said, but Richie ignored him. He took another hit of his juul before taking it out of his mouth and getting frustrated as no smoke came out of his mouth.

“Fuckin’ bitch.” He said, pulling the pod out of the device. He opened the compartment under the middle controls which revealed dozens of empty juul pods. Eddie’s eyes grew wide.

“How long have you been building up this mess?” He asked, Richie let out a small laugh.

“Like, a month, maybe a little more, maybe a little less.” He said. Eddie no longer felt safe as he gripped the handle even tighter. But it was too late to turn around now. They drove for a few minutes before Eddie noticed him going the opposite way to his house.

“Where are you going?” He asked as Richie sped through a yellow light.

“I want coffee. I _need_ coffee.” He said, pulling into the Dunkin’ Donuts. He told the worker what he wanted, then leaned back to see Eddie. “Want anything?” He said.

“I’m good. I don’t drink coffee, it’s bad for you.” He said. Richie laughed again.

He drove around to the window and grabbed his coffee before driving off.

“Now, where’s your house again?” Richie asked, pulling out a cigarette. He took out a lighter and lit the Newport before taking a long drag and blowing the smoke out the window.

“Seriously? Do you know what those will do to you?” Eddie said. Richie opened the glove box and threw the the half-full cigarette carton into it. There were many empty ones. “_Holy shit._”

“Yeah, I know what they do. But too late now I guess.” He said, taking another drag.

Richie turned on his phone which was connected to an aux cord that was connected to the stereo. He scrolled through a playlist before clicking a song. A rap song started playing and Richie turned the volume almost all the way up. Eddie hated people who did that. People who drove by, blasting their music so loud you could hear it three cars behind them. He also didn’t like rap too much. He could tell it was old by the style of the beat, if that makes sense. He barely knew what he was talking about.

“_She’s dressed in yellow, she says hello, come sit next to me you fine fellow. You run over there without a second to lose, and what comes next hey bust a move.”_ Richie sang along to the words. Eddie never liked rap, but he smiled at Richie happily singing along. He caught himself smirking and stopped immediately before Richie could notice.

The rest of the five minute ride was, in a way, enjoyable. Neither of them spoke, besides Richie’s singing. It was peaceful, sort of. Eddie was kind of happy. Kind of.

But he’d never admit it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapters 5 and 6 will be longer, hope ur ready


	5. the party

Eddie slumped in his seat from exhaustion and boredom. It was his last day of detention, but he still had another fifty minutes to go. He and the others sat in silence as the teacher typed on her computer. There was nothing to really talk about. Bill was asleep (shockingly enough), Beverly was biting her nails, while Richie went on his phone under the desk. Eddie looked over to see a smile plastered on his face. Richie adjusted his glasses and looked up and the rest of them. He looked like he was about to say something but then looked at the teacher and decided to keep his mouth shut. Then Ms.Lasko stood up.

“I’m going to use the restroom. I’ll be back in two minutes or less, you better be just like this when I come back.” She said, walking out. The door slammed behind her and the smile on Richie’s face grew wide again.

“Parents are gone all weekend, you know what this means.” He said. Bev and Bill started laughing and cheering silently.

“What does it mean?” Eddie asked, dumbfounded. Richie rolled his eyes, the corners of his lips still perking up.

“Party at my house, tonight. Be there.” He said, patting the smaller boy’s shoulder twice. Eddie adjusted his sleeve, brushing off the germs that lie on Richie’s hands.

“Me? You’re inviting _me_ to a party?” Eddie asked in confusion. He had never been invited to any party, let alone one of Richie’s.

Richie’s parties were always big. He didn’t live in a giant house or anything, but it was big enough to fit a _lot_ of people. At least half the grade showed up to these, if not almost all of it. Eddie’s seen pictures and videos from some of Richie’s parties, and it was an environment he’d never want to be around.

“Of course I am. Geeks need to have some fun too. Bring your friends, too.”

“Absolutely not, thank you very much.” He said, shaking his head. But maybe, just maybe, he’d change his mind. Ms.Lasko walked back in the classroom and the kids went back to the same boring nothingness they were doing before she left.

* * *

“You got invited to _what_?” Stan said with wide eyes, leaning over from the back seat. They were all sitting in the car as Mike drove to Ben’s house.

“No, _we_. _We_ got invited to Richie’s party.” Eddie said, sounding a little pissy from the passengers seat.

“Well we have to go. We _have_ to go.” Stan said.

“No, no! Absolutely not. And since when did you wanna go to _parties_?” Eddie said, turning around to face Stan and Ben in the backseat.

“I’m with Stan on this one, Eddie.” Mike said. “It’ll be fun. Come on, we’ve never been to a party. The only excitement we get is staying up late on a school night. There’s other things to do, more experiences we need to have.”

“I think Eddie’s right. Maybe we haven’t been invited for a reason.” Ben said, leaning forward towards Eddie.

“See, Ben agrees with me. It’s not a good idea.” Eddie continued. But something inside him was disagreeing. Something deep within him was telling he should go. _I mean, what’s the real harm in it?_

“Please please please, Eddie. We’ve been waiting for something fun to happen for years, and now it’s finally happening and you won’t even let it happen!” Stan said, arms waving around as he fell back into his seat.

Eddie sat and stared out the window for a minute, thinking. _I mean, what’s the real harm in it?_ He thought, _It’s not like_ one _party is going to ruin everything._

“Fine. We’ll go to the party.” Eddie said. Ben sat in shock while Mike and Stan cheering and patted Eddie with excitement.

* * *

They finally reached Ben’s house and hopped out of the car, Mike and Stan still smiling and grinning like idiots. Eddie still had a pissed off look on his face while Ben stopped caring about the entire situation. Ben opened the door and all four boys quickly ran upstairs to his room. Mike and Stan jumped onto Ben’s bed, Stan laying on his stomach and Mike leaning over the side on his back. Eddie walked in and sat in the chair at Ben’s desk, and Ben stood leaning against the wall next to the window.

“I still don’t think this party is a good idea. What if they make us do stuff?” Eddie said, looking grossed out.

“What do you mean _stuff_? It’s just a party Eddie, relax. Everything is gonna be just fine, the world won’t end if you hold one red solo cup for a night.” Mike leaned up from his upside down position. Eddie let out a sigh.

“What do we even wear to this kind of event?” Stan asked, closing the magazine he took off Ben’s desk.

“Shit. I didn’t even think about that. I mean, it’s not a formal event or anything so I don’t really think it matters what we wear. Like, we could probably go like this.” Mike said.

“This is just another stupid thing we have to worry about now. You see? Now I have one more thing to worry about, ON TOP of all the things I already have to worry about-”

“And what other things do you have to worry about right now?” Stan interrupted the short boy. Eddie scoffed, clearly annoyed.

“I don’t know, how about my life post-detention? Like, how about, I don’t know, what the fuck are colleges going to say when they see I had to go detention, let alone why I even WENT to detention, I mean-”

“Eddie,” Mike said, placing his hands on the boy’s shoulders. “Seriously? You were already told, it was your first offense, they aren’t putting it on any permanent record or anything any colleges will see. You’re gonna be fine, and I pray to God that the day you realize this will come sooner than later.”

Eddie let out a sigh. He looked around the room for a few seconds, eyes slowly darting from poster to picture. He composed himself. “Does anyone even know where this place is?

* * *

The boys walked into the single-family house and were immediately struck with deafness by the music that rang in their ears. There were people filling every corner of it, and big groups of girls seemed to love the music as they screamed along with the words, _HAIR GROW LONG LIKE CHIA, MONEY GO LONG LIKE NIA, I AM THE BIG IDEA, MY TWIN’S BIG LIKE TIA, MY TWIN’S BIG LIKE TIA TAMERA_. Some of them dancing on random boys, some dancing quite sexually on other girls while laughing and shrieking. Everyone was holding either a red solo cup or an entire bottle of something the boys would never even touch. It was a scene straight from any teenage drama.

“Holy shit.” Stan said. As if on cue, a girl stumbled into Ben.

It was Bev.

“Ohhh shit! You guys really came! I know Richie invited you guys but shit I thought you would just pussy out!” She said, stumbling back. She was definitely already wasted.

Bev took Ben’s and pulled him with her. “You,” She pressed her index finger on his chest, “need a drink!” She giggled and pulled him away from the boys.

“Where are you going?” Mike yelled. Ben just shrugged and let Bev drag him away to wherever.

The remaining three walked further into the house. Some girl stumbled over Stan while laughing intensely. She shoved her cup into him before another girl aggressively pulled her back over to wherever they came from. Stan grabbed the cup before it fell, spilling what looked and smelled like beer on his shirt. The girls suddenly came stumbling back, grabbing Stan by the shirt and dragging him farther into the house to more of her friends.

The regular lights were off and random blue lights came from nowhere. The entire house smelled like a new pair of shoes mixed with an empty beer bottle, a combination Eddie never would’ve used in the same thought. Suddenly another boy came out of nowhere. It was Bill.

“Holy shit, its you guys!” He laughed, smile wide and eyelids hanging low. “Come on, come with me, come on!”

Bill took Mike’s hand and led the two boys to a small room on the left of the house. He opened the door and there was an automatic change of pace. While the rest of the house yelled and drank and danced and jumped, the people in here were all sitting down. The single normal light was on, making the room dim and yellow. You could barely see anything as there was smoke everywhere and it stank of fresh weed. Kids were scattered around the room, sitting on the couch, a few beanbags, and the floor. Some took turns on a bong, some were sharing a pipe, and the rest were passing around a thick and tightly rolled blunt. The floor was littered with crumbs from chips, cookies, and whatever else they seemed to have found in the house. There were three less than half-full 2-liter soda bottles on a coffee table that had bags from an array of food all over and around it. Bill took Mike by the hand and pulled him over to the couch where there was now five people squeezed next to each other. Mike started smiling. Everyone was laughing. Everyone except Eddie.

“Welcome to the hotbox.” Bill said, his arms spreading as if he was displaying the room to Eddie. The person next to him on the couch passed him one of the blunts. He took a sick hit before blowing a huge cloud of smoke into the air. He started coughing and laughing, the combination coming out in nasty chokes. He passed the blunt to Mike, who barely knew how to hold it. Mike stared at it, almost scared of it. He looked back at the lanky boy sitting next to him.

“Look, suck it in, hold it for a second, then blow it out.” Bill instructed him. Mike took a hit, and boy was it a long one. He quickly sucked it into his lungs before blowing it out and coughing roughly. Someone passed him and opened and almost empty water bottle. Mike chugged the rest, coughed another few times, and then sunk in his seat. He started laughing and cackling, as if someone just showed him the funniest thing he had ever seen in his life. The rest of the kids on the couch started laughing with him. They were laughing so hard, one of them started clutching their stomachs while another leaned over and started literally smacking their knee. Eddie stood in disgust and slight fear. The fear, of course, he would never show. _What the fuck_ he thought, _is going on._

Emerging from a cloud of smoke was another tall and skinny boy. He put his hands up and adjusted his thick-rimmed glasses.

“Holy shit Eddie, y-you’re here!” The boy said. He came through the smoke.

It was Richie. _Of course it was fucking Richie._

“Here, let’s get out of here.” Richie took Eddie’s forearm and led him out of the room. He turned back to see Mike. Him and Bill were staring at each other and giggling like little girls. Eddie felt… weird.

They left out of the other door attached to the right side of the room. They entered another room, this one with dim purple lights all around. There were more kids moving through it, music loud again. Not as loud as the blue area, but still too loud for Eddie to think. More kids singing again, this time it was all of them yelling and dancing, _I KNOW YOU THINK ABOUT ME IN THE SHOWER, PORNHUB IN YOUR BROWSER, FANTASIZE ABOUT THE PUSSY POWER_ they all yelled, happily drunk.

Richie and Eddie kept walking until they reached a free space in the corner of the room. Richie turned back to Eddie.

“Hey it’s so cool that you came here.” He said.

“I didn’t plan on it. I was forced to. Not only by you, my stupid friends dragged me here. I don’t want to be here.” Eddie made sure Richie knew that he did _not_ want to be at that party.

“Well, still. Why don’t you just go home?” He asked, very confused.

“Well Mike was my ride here but he’s definitely not fit to drive, I have absolutely no idea where Stan and Ben went, and-” Eddie was cut off.

“Richie! Richie, come here, NOW.” Someone yelled.

“Hold on.” Richie said, standing up to talk to the random guy. He abruptly walked away and Eddie let out a sigh as he sunk into the couch. His head was pounding along with the music. Suddenly the music stopped. Most of the kids were confused, all the raised hands and bouncing bodies came down. There was a faint conversation that Eddie could barely make out. Suddenly he heard a squeaky door close before watching Richie stand high on a chair.

“That was the police, the neighbors complained. Everyone go home.” He said. There were a ton of _awww_s as the people flooded out the door. Even the hotbox door opened, smoke poured out almost as fast as the kids. Eddie shot up.

“Stan! Ben! Mike! Literally anyone who knows me!” He yelled out. But the house emptied and Eddie was left there. Richie walked over to another room. Eddie rubbed his face before walking over to the room Richie was in. He saw the tall boy start to clear the kitchen of cups, pushing them into a big black garbage bag. His head popped up when he saw Eddie was in there.

“Why are you still here? You were really going off about wanting to go home, and now that everybody’s gone you decided to stay?”

Eddie looked at the ground. “Well, Mike was my ride home, and he and literally everybody else left so now I’m stuck here.”

Richie let out an audible cackle.

“I know, I know, laugh it up.”

“I can take you home if you really want?” Richie said.

“Nuh-uh, absolutely not, there is absolutely no way you are sober so no.” Eddie said, shaking his head.

“I only had one beer, I’m not drunk in the slightest.” Richie explained.

“Nope. Not taking the chance.”

“So, what, you’re just gonna stay here? I mean, I don’t mind, my parents won’t be home until Monday so you can stay the night. If you want.” He said, as if it were up to Eddie.

It was up to him. But he would just continue to lie to himself, saying he didn’t have a choice. He could easily walk home. It might take a while, and it was definitely past curfew. So he decided to stay. It was his only choice.

...Right?


	6. mistakes and a song

Eddie walked over to Richie to start helping him clean up the house that was currently flooded with red solo cups and empty chip bags. Awkward silence filled the air besides their shuffling to rid the home of what the party left behind.

“Why did you even throw this party?” Eddie asked, “Like, you knew you were gonna have to clean all this shit up later, so why even throw it in the first place?”

Richie shrugged. “Fun? I don’t really know.”

Eddie almost felt bad for him. He wondered if Richie felt this way about everything he did. Maybe all the questioning Eddie was doing, Richie was doing the same. It made Eddie sad. But he also questioned why he even cared? He hated Richie. He _despised_ Richie. But suddenly, he started to ponder if even that was true. Did he really hate Richie, or did he just not know him well enough to consider liking him?

“So, you just threw it for no reason in particular? Just because you could?” Eddie said, stopping what he was doing.

“I mean, my parents aren’t really around too much, so I guess it’s better than being alone.” He said, focusing solely on cleaning, almost as if he was avoiding talking about it. Suddenly, he stopped what he was doing.

“I need a smoke.” He said, “You don’t have to come, but I’ll be out back if you need me.”

Now Eddie did feel bad. He dropped his stuff and followed Richie out back.

Outside was a table with a bunch of empty cigarette cartons and on the ground was dozens of cigarette butts. Eddie was so surprised by the amount that he wondered if Richie had smoked them all himself. Of course, he knew the answer. But he didn’t like admitting it. It made him sadder.

“I’d offer you one but you’re pretty against this shit.” Richie said, placing a cigarette between his lips and raising the lighter to the end of it. He took a long drag before taking the cancer stick out of his mouth with his index and middle finger. He blew the smoke out and Eddie could smell it immediately, even as the wind blew it away. Eddie hated cigarettes, but watching Richie fall out of his tense figure and into a more relaxed state was pleasing to him. It made him relax too.

“Sorry.” Richie said. Eddie was confused, and he looked it, too.

“For what?”

“I know you don’t like this stuff. And I know you don’t like me. So, sorry for having to be stuck with me tonight.” he said, a hint of sadness in his voice. The boys were quiet for a minute. Richie finished the entire smoke and put it out on the table. It made Eddie cringe. They walked back inside and Richie slammed the sliding door closed.

They walked through the house and finished picking up all the party left behind. Richie led Eddie around the house. Then, something caught Eddie’s eyes. It was a guitar. A nice one, too. A beautiful light brown one, acoustic, which wasn’t something he expected to see.

“Is that your parents?” Eddie asked, looking at it directly.

“Nope, all mine. Used to play it when I was young, still know a few things.” Richie said. Eddie walked over to it and picked it up.

“Play it for all the ladies you bring home nowadays?” He said, letting out a scoff.

“No, just for enjoyment. And time passing I guess.” Richie said, taking it out of the boy’s hands.

“Play me a tune.” Eddie said, half sarcastically. Richie stopped in his steps, first going to put the instrument back, but now taking it over to the couch. Eddie was a bit surprised.

Richie started testing out the cords, tuning a few strings until he was satisfied with the sounds. “I’m pretty rusty, haven’t played in a bit.” He started playing the chords to a song that sounded a bit familiar to Eddie. He wasn’t quite sure, until Richie started singing along.

_”When you were here before, couldn’t look you in the eye. You’re just like an angel, your skin makes me cry. You float like a feather, in a beautiful world. And I wish I was special, you're so fuckin' special, but I'm a creep. I'm a weirdo. What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here.”_ He sang. Eddie was mesmerized. He felt like he was floating, high and lost in the sounds. Beautiful, beautiful sounds. He hated admitting it, but Richie had talent, and a lot of it.

_“I don't care if it hurts, I want to have control. I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul.”_ Eddie could feel whatever feelings Richie was. He could tell the boy was singing these words like they were his own. He could feel the connection Richie had with just one song, how much he could relate to it. Eddie’s breathing was steadily rigid, but anything he did would go unnoticed by the singing boy.

_“I want you to notice when I'm not around.”_ Eddie felt that one the most. He could feel the words coming from Richie’s soul. _“You're so fuckin' special. I wish I was special.”_

_“Whatever makes you happy. Whatever you want. You're so fuckin' special. I wish I was special.”_ Eddie knew this song was personal to Richie. Richie had said he wasn’t as good as he used to be, but Eddie knew he was lying. For this song in particular, at least. He could tell this song had been played often, and sung often. He sang these words like they were _him_. If Richie had been a song, it would be this one.

_“But I'm a creep. I'm a weirdo. What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here. I don't belong here.”_ He finished the song, strumming the last cord. He didn’t look up for a few seconds. Then he perked his head up. If the lights weren’t so dim, Eddie might’ve seen his very red face. Eddie could feel his own face getting red.

“I know, I suck. Like I said, it’s been a while.” He sighed with the last sentence. He stood up with the guitar and put it back on the stand before walking back and sitting in the same spot on the couch.

“N-no it was good. Like, really good. Why don’t you do it more often, or for any of the shows in school? You could be in the band.”

“Me? In the band? Or literally anything that has to do with that prison? You’re funny, Eds.” He said with a small and painfully fake and nervous laugh.

“What’s you’re vendetta against that place? Like, yeah, the people are shitty. But that doesn’t mean you need to rebel against the whole place. I mean it’s like a hobby for you to skip class to smoke or something. I question how you have yet to be held back yet.”

“I don’t know. That’s just the way it’s always been.” Richie said. But it was a lie.

“That’s not true.” Eddie said, shaking his head. “You used to enjoy living.”

Richie winced at that. He looked hurt by that, but it was so faint as he tried covering it as much as he could. He knew it was true, but he hated admitting it. People always asked him, _What happened to that happy kid?_ But in all honesty, he didn’t really know. And he wasn’t sure if he wanted to. All he knew was what he was then, and what he is now. And what he was now is who he needed to play to be who he is now.

“Anyways, what about you, huh? Why are you such a little princess all the time?” Richie asked, bitterness escaping his mouth.

“What the fuck does that mean?” Eddie asked, equally as annoyed.

“I mean, what’s with the germ phobia? Why are you such a health nut? Don’t you ever let loose once in a while? I mean, what do _you_ do for fun?” He asked, leaning down with his forearm resting on his knee.

If he was being totally honest, he didn’t know. His entire life revolved around studying, taking his medication, and staying healthy. He didn’t do much else. When he hung out with Stan, Mike, and Ben, they studying with him. Sometimes, they played games or went for drives, maybe got some ice cream, but nothing too big. In fact, this party had to be the biggest thing any of them had ever done. And he was pretty positive it would be the biggest thing they ever would do. Eddie didn’t plan on doing anything big in college. He would focus on all his studies, work hard in all his classes, and graduate at the top of his class.

He stared at Richie, not knowing what to say. Richie could see the sadness and confusion on Eddie’s face and felt it in his own soul. Richie could kind of relate. He didn’t really know if what he did was fun or if it was just filling up the emptiness he always felt. That was what they had in common- how lonely and empty they felt all the time.

It was something neither of them were proud of, of course. Who would be? And it most definitely wasn’t something either of them would ever share with anyone. But, who counted as anyone?

“What time is it?” Richie asked. Eddie looked down at his watch. _Holy shit,_ he thought, _it’s already one a.m._

“It’s already one in the morning.” He said, still taking it in. Eddie never stays up this late unless he has homework to finish.

“Oh ok, I thought it would be super late.” Richie said. Eddie was grossly confused.

“Super late? Richie it’s one in the goddamn morning.” He said, stiffly raising his hand to make sure he was getting his point across.

“Are you kidding me? I never go to bed this early.” Richie said. Eddie leaned forward a bit.

“How many hours do you usually get a night?” Eddie asked. Richie leaned back, sinking into the couch. He blew out a faint raspberry and pushed his hair back before it messily returned to his forehead.

“Like… I don’t know, maybe one or two? Maybe three. Four if I’m _really_ lucky. But that’s if I sleep at all.” He said like it was a normal thing.

“Richie… that’s not healthy.” Eddie said, genuinely concerned for the boy’s health.

“I can’t help it. It’s like, no matter how tired I am, my body just won’t let me sleep. Like I’m fucking exhausted right now. But I couldn’t sleep if I wanted to.” He said, almost like he didn’t know he was sad.

“You know, there’s a word for that. For what you are.” Eddie told him, feeling bad for him.

“So what am I?” He asked.

“You have insomnia. You’re an insomniac.”

“What the hell is an _insoniac?_” He asked, sinking deeper into the couch in confusion.

“It’s someone who can’t fall asleep, no matter how hard they try. Like you just said.” Eddie said with his eyebrows raised.

“Is that a bad thing?”

“Kind of, yeah.” Eddie said, clearly under-exaggerating. Of course, Richie couldn’t tell. “Who else knows about this?”

“No one. I mean, Bill and Bev know I don’t sleep and sometimes they stay up with me.” He said, looking up in thought. “But I can’t keep them up with me every night. They need sleep, even if I can’t get any.”

“I mean someone who can do something about it. Your parents, or a doctor maybe.” Eddie said with his neck leaning out like this was an obvious thing to assume. Well, it was. Eddie suddenly remembered what had happened to Richie last year, and it all made sense now.

Last April, it was a regular day at school. It was gym class and Richie was actually present that day, which was rare. The class was running around the track field, and Richie looked awful. He kept yawning and breathing heavily and often got too tired to keep running. He kept bending over to take heavy breaths, but Eddie didn’t care. He figured it was just from all the smoke he was constantly filling his lungs with. But soon enough, Richie took one final yawn before completely passing out on the track. Eddie heard a bunch of running feet behind him before turning to see what was going on. He jogged over to the boy lying on the ground but he could barely get a view of what was happening as everyone else had already crowded the tall boy. The gym teacher shook the boy and he reluctantly woke and sat up, putting his elbows behind him to lean up.

“What the hell was that, kid?” The coach asked. Richie just let out a sigh before being escorted to the nurse. He was out of school the next day, but he often skipped class so Eddie didn’t think much of it. At the time, Eddie couldn’t have cared less about what happened to the boy.

“Is that what happened last year? When you passed out in gym class, it was from exhaustion, wasn’t it?” Eddie pointed out. Richie slowly nodded his head. Eddie frowned and stared at the floor. He looked up at Richie. The two sadly stared at each other for a solid thirty seconds. Richie then shook his head and stood up.

“We should get settled for bed, you’re probably tired as shit.” He said. Eddie stood up with him and they walked to Richie’s bedroom.

Richie pulled a bunch of blankets out of the closet and layered them on the floor creating a makeshift bed. He then reached into a drawer in his dresser and pulled out a t-shirt and pajama pants before throwing them to the smaller boy.

“They might be a bit big on you, but you’ll survive.”

Eddie wasn’t sure he wanted to wear the pajamas of the boy he supposedly hated. He threw the clothes back at Richie.

“I think I’m fine with the clothes I’m wearing now.” Eddie said. He knew sleeping in jeans wasn’t going to be comfortable, but he refused to dress himself in the clothes of his _“enemy”_. Richie just shrugged his shoulders.

“You’re choice, not mine.”

Richie took the clothes and tossed them on his bed. He started taking off his shirt before Eddie turned around, covering the side of his face with his cupped hand. Yet he still looked in the mirror to look at the half naked boy. Richie was a slim tall and lanky boy. He was pretty pale, but he sort of pulled it off. He may have been slim, but it worked for him. Eddie felt his heart skip a beat, but he didn’t want to admit it to himself. The slim boy threw the loose white t-shirt over his body before sliding off his own belt and jeans. Eddie kept staring, but quickly realized what he was doing and looked away as the other boy saw him looking at him through the full body length mirror. He let out a scoff like laugh, shaking his head. He slipped on the loose blue and black plaid pajama pants and sat on the bed.

“You can turn around now.” He said, still smiling. Eddie turned around with his eyebrows furrowed. He stared to crouch down and lay on the blanket bed before Richie stopped him.

“No, you take the bed. I’ll take the floor.” He said. Eddie looked at him, confused.

“Why?”

“You seem like the kind of kid who hates sleeping out of his own room. Maybe at one of your friend’s houses, but definitely not here. So you should at least _try_ to get comfy.” Richie said while getting under the first blanket layer. Eddie thought for a minute before letting out a sigh.

“Just come up here with me.” Eddie said. RIchie smiled.

Eddie grabbed one of the four pillows that leaned against the wall behind the bed and put it next to him to divide the queen-sized bed into two twin-sized sections. The two boys climbed under the thick white blanket on their own sides. Eddie leaned over and shut the lamp that was sitting on the nightstand next to his side of the bed.

“Goodnight, Richie.”

“Goodnight, Eddie.”

* * *

When Eddie woke up the next morning, he noticed the other boy was still asleep. He also noticed Richie’s arm around his arm and torso, and the pillow that was supposed to divide them had somehow ended up at the foot of the bed. He would have moved it if he didn’t know Richie’s sleeping habits. He didn’t want to wake the boy, _who knows what time he went to bed?_ Eddie thought. But he oddly felt safe under the tall, slim boy. He let out a breath and closed his eyes again, falling asleep for another hour.

By the time he woke up again, the blanket on the other side of him was open and Richie was nowhere to be found. Or so he thought, before smelling something very nice coming from another room. Eddie stood up and walked out of the room, following the delicious scent that led him to the kitchen. He watched Richie flip a pancake before taking a sip of a drink, most likely coffee, and placing it back down after one gulp. He shoved the spatula under the perfectly cooked pancake and slid it on top of the stack of already cooked pancakes on a plate next to him. He turned around to lean on the counter before noticing the boy looking at him.

“Goodmorning.” He said, grabbing the mug and taking another sip.

Eddie yawned. “Goodmorning to you too. Smells delicious.” He said, pointing to the stack of pancakes.

Richie picked up the empty bowl that was formerly filled with pancake mix and a now empty ladle. He dropped it in the sink and picked up the plate of pancakes. Eddie was a bit cautious of eating only calorie-packed pancakes for breakfast, but he would’ve felt rude refusing to eat the breakfast that the other boy so nicely made for him. Richie walked over to the small round white dining table in the kitchen. He walked back over and opened a cabinet to pull out a bottle of syrup and two plates. He walked back to the table and placed the syrup next to the pancakes and the plates in front of two of the chairs. He sat down in one of them as Eddie walked over and sat down in the other chair in front of the other plate placed on the table. He took a fork and stuck it in two pancakes, moving them onto his place. He cut them up into triangle slices like a pizza and poured syrup into a little pool on the side of his plate, being careful not to let it seep into the pancakes. Richie just took the bottle and poured a mountain of syrup on top of the pancakes, making Eddie cringe a bit. He hated soggy pancakes. The way it made the breakfast food all soggy was something the boy did _not_ enjoy.

They both dug into their breakfast, not speaking for the first minute of devouring their first meal of the day. After swallowing his piece of pancake that finished off the first pancake layer, Eddie spoke up.

“What time did you wind up falling asleep?” He asked.

“Um, two? I think.” Richie said while chewing a piece of pancake. It made Eddie feel gross.

Eddie looked at his watch. _8:23,_ it read. Six hours was two hours over what the boy had said his longest slumber was on a good day. It made Eddie feel almost accomplished, like he had just solved a difficult math problem that had taken him an hour to complete. He smiled and looked up at the boy.

“I’m glad. It’s not much, but it's more than you said you usually slept for. That’s good, Richie.”

Richie enjoyed the way Eddie spoke his name. It made him feel sort of warm inside. He let the faintest smile spread across his face as he shoved another piece of food into his mouth.

After the boys finished their food and placed their plates and utensils into the sink, Richied grabbed his keys.

“I guess it’s time to bring you home.” He said.

Eddie went into a panic mode. _Holy shit,_ he thought, _what the fuck is my mom going to do when she gets her hands on me?_ But he didn’t openly share his panicking state to Richie. He simply grabbed his phone and walked out of the house, following behind the other boy.

They hopped in the car and Richie turned the keys, starting the vehicle. He took out a cigarette from the pack in his glove compartment, lighting it with a purple lighter and taking a drag. Eddie just looked at him. Richie pulled out of the driveway and the boys were off.

When they arrived at the boy’s house, Eddie sighed and looked out of the car window. He unbuckled his seat belt and climbed out of the car. He slammed his door shut before sticking his head slightly through the window.

“Thanks, Richie. For everything.” Eddie said.

“Anytime, Eds.” Richie said with a smile.

The nickname made Eddie feel unusually warm inside, making his insides feel like they were twisting around. But he couldn’t quite figure out what it meant. But somewhere, deep deep down in his soul, he knew exactly what it meant. And the thought of it made him feel absolutely confused and almost gross.

But it is what it is. Or, that’s what Eddie told himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i told you fuckers this chapter would be long and special


	7. minute by minute

The next school day, Eddie was walking into school like normal. As he walked along the light, almost cream colored cement, something inside him made him stop. He turned around to see half his books lying across the floor. His backpack had unzipped and his belongings were spilled on the ground. He bent down and started to pick them up when he heard a car pull up quickly and park, blasting music.

“Eddie!” Someone yelled. Eddie didn’t even have to look up to recognize the voice. It was Richie. Eddie sighed as he heard the music abruptly quiet down. The car door opened as Richie climbed out before slamming it shut. He jogged over to Eddie.

“Hey.” He said, walking with him. Eddie had a pissed-off look on his face.

He did _not_ want to talk to Richie Tozier of all people right now. He wasn’t pissed off before, but now that _he’s_ here, Eddie wanted nothing to do with it. He never liked Richie. He wasn’t supposed to. He was a good boy, and a good, smart, future-ahead-of-him guy was not supposed to be seen with a no-good, class skipping, weed smoking delinquent like Richie Tozier. It could kill his reputation. Going to that party could already have fucked up everyone’s opinions on him. And he didn’t like it. He just didn’t.

He felt himself starting to panic. He _cannot_ be seen with Richie Tozier. It made his insides swirl. Maybe he wanted to be with him. No, not like that. Well… no. He pushed that thought away. _What the fuck are you talking about, you hate him!_ Eddie thought to himself. But then he remembered the party. The sweet boy he met for the first time. The sweet, broken boy. Not the bad boy he knew Richie to be. The boy whose parents weren't often there. The boy who couldn’t focus in class if he wanted to. The depressed insomniac that was Richie Tozier.

But Richie wasn’t turning around. He kept walking with Eddie. Eddie walked to his locker and Richie stayed with him.

“What are you doing?” Eddie asked. Richie shrugged.

“Bev and Bill aren’t here, so I have no one else to walk with.” He said. Eddie sighed.

“Whatever you say.” Eddie kept walking. Richie kept following.

What Eddie didn’t know was that Richie was walking with him because he felt safer with him. The thing is, Richie didn’t know that either. He knew he felt something, something better, with him. But he barely knew what he was thinking about.

Once Eddie found his friends talking outside their first period classroom, he thought Richie would walk away. He did not. His friends smiled when they saw Eddie, but their faces quickly changed when they saw who was with him.

“Guys, Richie. Richie, my friends.” He pointed to them, rocking on his feet.

“Yeah, we know.” Stan said. The look on his face was a mixture of confused, irritated, and scared.

Ben stuck his hand out for Richie to shake. “Ben Hanscom, nice to meet you.” Richie slapped it with his and clutched it. Ben was confused but followed along.

Mike had wide eyes, but still waved to Richie. “Mike,” He pointed to Stan, “Stan.” Stan waved to him too.

“I’ve seen you guys walking around, nice to put names to the faces.” Richie nodded, but in a cool, laid back way.

Stan pulled Eddie aside, a step away from the others. “What the hell are you doing with _Richie Tozier?_” He said quietly.

“Well when you fucking idiots left me at the party, I got stuck there with him. I guess he thinks we’re friends now.” Eddie replied. He wasn’t sure if he _wanted_ to be Richie’s friend.

“I don’t want him to be our friend.” Stan said, tightly grabbing Eddie’s arm. Eddie yanked his arm away. He didn’t know what he wanted. But he couldn’t let anyone know he was actually considering Richie as a friend. Eddie turned back to the boy and sighed. He didn’t know what to do. He wanted to keep his real friends, the people who were always there for him. But something inside him made him really want to be with Richie. Be _friends_ with Richie. But he’s said it before and he’ll say it again; He’s not friends with Richie, and he couldn’t if he wanted to be.

“Richie, can you fuck off?” He said before pulling him aside. “Listen, I know we got along at the party and we talked and yeah, it was fun. But it’s time for a reality check: we are not friends. And we were never meant to be friends.”

Richie had a sad look on his face, and it made Eddie feel sick. “What do you mean?”

“I mean- well, look at us. You’re failing classes and skipping to smoke weed and smoke cigarettes while driving for God’s sake. And I’m not. I’m a straight-A student, I don’t go to detention on a regular basis. I’ve never been suspended. I have a future.” Richie winced at that last sentence. It hurt him to remember that he wasn’t good enough and never would be good enough to get anywhere.

He remembered when his parents found his stash. Cigarettes, weed, xans, and a little bit of oxy. He wasn’t proud of having all of it, but he felt like he was nothing without it. He didn’t want to admit he had a bit of a problem, because then everyone who tells him he’ll never become anything would be right. And he thought of a future for him, a good one. College and a good job and a nice family and whatnot.

The bell rang. Two minutes left before class started.

“Richie, I have to go. You should, too.” Eddie walked off into the classroom and Richie walked away.

Richie was in Eddie’s first period, but what Eddie had said about him made him never want to step foot in a classroom again. He was angry, he wanted to fuck off from the building as a school. But then something clicked in him after he had walked down to the end of the hall. He could prove these bitches wrong if he wanted to. Did he want to.

The bell rang again.

* * *

“You’re late, Mr.Tozier.” The teacher explained. Richie just sighed and sat down as the teacher wrote him a detention slip. Eddie was conflicted, and he didn’t really know why. He didn’t want to go to detention again. He hated it. But something was drawing him to it, someone maybe, so he knew, he was definitely in a conflict. He impulsively made his detention.

The teacher wrote a long problem on the board. She always did this, every morning, so the kids could have an idea of what that days lesson would be on.

“Who wants to try and solve this?” She asked. Nobody raised their hands as today’s lesson was brand new so obviously none of the kids would understand it. Eddie’s heart raced. The teacher turned around and started to teach the problem, but Eddie spoke up.

“I’ll try it, Ms.K.” He said, His hand was raised, and his fingers were almost all pulled down into his fist. Except for one.

“Mr.Kaspbrak, are you serious right now?” All the students turned to him, scoffing in laughter and giggling and whispering. But most of all, Richie was looking at him wide-eyed, with a slight smile. Eddie smiled in satisfaction. “See me after class.”

The class went by quick, and Eddie felt like he was going to vomit everywhere as he walked up to the teacher at the end of class. He wanted more than anything to just apologize and beg her not to punish him, but it was too late. He had to finish what he started. The adrenaline started pumping.

“Listen, Eddie. I know you’re a good kid. And I’m not sure what you’re going through that’s making you act out like this. I mean first you punch a kid in the face, and now you’re flipping me off in the middle of class? I have no choice Eddie.” She said, writing out and ripping a detention slip off the pad. He sighed with a slight smile.

“It’s fine.” He said calmly, swiping the slip from her hand and walked off with his head held high.

When he left the classroom, he thought Richie would be there. He didn’t know why, but he had a feeling he would be waiting for him. He wasn’t. And that made Eddie sad. But it couldn’t. Why would he be sad about someone he doesn’t like not being there for him.

The day went by fast, and soon enough it was time for detention. He walked in to see just Richie sitting there. He looked up at him as Eddie sat at the desk next to him. He leaned into him.

“What the fuck was that?” Richie asked.

“What?” Eddie asked. “You’re not one to speak Mister I’m-in-here-everyday.”

Richie sighed, then smiled. “It was badass, Eds.”

The corner of Eddie’s mouth peaked up.

“But why did you do it?”

Eddie wasn’t totally sure. He wanted to be with Richie. But he didn’t. But so badly, he did. And this was the only time and place he could be without being questioned. He also _loved_ the adrenaline rush it gave him. His heart was beating so loud and fast he could feel it in his throat. And normally, that would make him almost vomit. But this time, it was exhilarating. He loved it so much, he wanted to do it everyday. _Is this what cocaine is like?_ He thought. He remembered feeling that way when he first did what he did. He didn’t answer Richie.

The two boys sat on their phones for God knows how long before the teacher stood up and announced that they could leave. They walked out together and down the hallway they went.

“Why did you do what you did in the first place? The first time you came to this dreaded place after hours?”

“Why did I punch Bowers?” Eddie asked, looking concerned at Richie’s question.

“Yeah. It’s not something I’d expect anyone like you to do. So, what was so bad that made you deck him?”

Eddie looked at him. “You don’t wanna know. I don’t want you to know.”

“Well now you have to say it. Come on, I’m not gonna say anything.”

Eddie sighed. He couldn’t keep it to himself any longer.

“He… called someone something.”

“What did he say? Who did he say it to?”

“He was just talking to his friends, I overheard him say something. About… you.”

Richie paused in his tracks. “What the fuck did that little shit say about me?” He said it like it was more of a statement than a question.

Eddie stopped and turned around to him. He took a breath and gripped the straps of his backpack.

“He… called you a…” He paused. He leaned in and whispered. “He called you a fag.”

“WHAT?” Richie yelled.

“Richie, please don’t freak out. It’s fine, please.” Richie started power-walking down the hall. “Richie- Richie PLEASE-” Eddie started running after him, but his short legs compared to Richie’s tall and lanky ones were too big of a difference for him to successfully catch up.

He knew what was going to happen. Henry Bowers and his gang were always hanging outside the school, they were there for hours after school, everyday, for no reason except they had nothing better to do. Richie threw the doors open and stormed out to them.

“Richie- WAIT!” Eddie tried yelling to him. By the time he was outside, a fight was already brewing. There were a few kids still hanging out outside the school, waiting for parents to get them from a club or just hanging out. Richie had Henry by his collar, yelling in his face. Bowers pushed him away, but Richie pushed him back, harder. Bill and Bev were hanging by Richie’s car, waiting for him to get out of detention, Eddie assumed. As soon as Eddie screamed for Richie, the two friends looked over. But it was too late, Richie had punched Bowers, and that made him angry. They started swinging at each other as Eddie, Bill, and Bev ran over.

“Richie, _RICHIE!_” Beverly screamed. Henry’s friends started hitting Richie too. Bev tried to break it up, but accidentally got elbowed in the face by one of Henry’s friends. She rubbed her cheek before screaming and grabbing him by his shirt, pulling him back.

“What, you gonna bang me while he bangs your fag friend?” He said. Beverly kneed him in the balls. He fell instantly. Bill pulled another friend off of Richie and brought him close to his face.

“Aw, what are you gonna do B-B-Billy? He taunted. Bill clocked him, and the kid punched back. They got into their own fight. Eddie was horrified. But Richie started winning. His face was bleeding, but Bowers was down on the ground as Richie kept kicking him, over and over in his stomach. Bill and the other kid backed off of each other to watch what was going on. Eddie felt his legs started to move closer.

“Richie, please. Please, stop, PLEASE!” He yelled. Richie stopped and Bowers slowly got off the ground, clutching his stomach.

“What, Rich? Need your little _boyfriend_ to calm you down?”

This sent Eddie off. That rush of excitement and adrenaline kicked in again, but it wasn’t excitement this time, it was anger. Serious anger, worse than the first time. He ran to Bowers and clocked him again, but this time Bowers pushed back. So hard, Eddie hit the statue behind him. He hit his head so hard that everyone could hear the clang of the metal statue behind them. Eddie’s ears were ringing. He touched the back of his head and blood spilled onto his fingertips. Bowers looked satisfied before him and his friends jogged off. That was all Eddie remembered before his vision went black.

* * *

When he woke up, Eddie saw the roof of a car. He turned his head and saw Richie in the driver's seat, speeding away to wherever. His head was in someone’s lap, and there was a skinny, pale hand on his head.

“He’s awake!” Someone yelled. It was a higher pitched voice, Beverly’s voice.

Bill turned his head around from the front seat and Richie looked at him through the rear-view mirror. Eddie still felt dizzy and dazed, but he was awake. “Where are we going?”

“To a hospital.” Richie said, still going fast. It was making Eddie’s pounding headache worse. He knew something was off, like he was forgetting something as he tried to relax. Then his eyes flew open and he sat up quickly, hitting his head on the roof of the car. He started reaching frantically for his phone.

“Eddie, Eddie you need to lie down.” Bev said, pulling him back down.

“No, no my mother. My mother- she’s gonna freak. You can’t take me to the hospital, I need to call her. Where’s my phone?” He kept trying to search for it. Beverly pulled it out from under him and handed it to him. He unlocked the phone and dialed the number.

“Fuck- fuck! What do I tell her?” He said as the phone rang. She picked up. Eddie put his hand over the microphone.

“Slow down!” He whisper yelled. Richie obeyed. “Hey mom!” He said with a smile on his face.

“Eddie, where in God’s name are you? You’ve been gone all afternoon.” She said, angry.

“I’m just hanging out with Stan and Mike. We’re just driving around, probably going to get dinner soon.” He lied.

“Oh, ok. Be back by curfew.” She said, more relaxed but still mad.

“Yes, of course.” He said.

“Ok, I love you, Eddie bear.”

“I love you too, mommy.” Beverly snorted and Eddie smacked her arm. She stopped laughing, still smiling. He hung up the phone and Beverly bursted out laughing while Bill giggled in the front seat.

“Is there a fucking issue?” Eddie said, angrily.

“No, no of course not. Eddie bear.” Bev said, laughing even more.

He looked over at Bill who was laughing even harder now.

“What the fuck are you laughing at?” He yelled. They both tried stopping, but wound up just choking on giggles. “I have to be back by curfew.”

“And when’s that?” Richie asked.

“Well, it’s a friday. So ten.” He said.

“Ten? Like, ten p.m.?” Richie asked to confirm that what he heard was correct.

“Yes. Unless I tell her I’m sleeping there, I have to be home by ten. We’ll be back before that right?” Eddie asked. “Where are we going now, anyways?”

Richie made a U-turn a minute ago, so Eddie had no clue where they were going.

“My house.” Richie said.


	8. aftermath

They pulled into Richie’s driveway and stumbled out of the car. Beverly hopped out, making Eddie’s head bounce on the seat.

“Sorry.”

“No, no. You’re fine.” Eddie said with a groan. He stumbled out of the vehicle and walked in behind the others. Bill threw the door open and frantically made sure nothing was in the way

The house was just as he remembered it. It felt different, thought. Like something new. Eddie was wrapped around Bev and Richie, one arm around each of their necks, dragging himself into the house. They plopped him down onto the couch in Richie’s living room and Eddie took a breath. He sighed deeply.

“I have this… ringing in my ears. It’s more faint than it was before but holy _shit_ it’s annoying.” Eddie said, rubbing his temples.

“I-I’ll go get some p-p-p-_fuckin’ hell_, pain-killers.” Bill said. Eddie sat up quickly, making his headache worse.

“What do you mean?”

“Christ, I-I mean advil not oxy. Relax.” Eddie closed his eyes as he fell onto the couch and put the back of his hand against his forehead. He sighed in pain and prayed this wouldn’t mess with the medication he already takes that his mother gives him.

Beverly looked down at the watch around her wrist. “Shit, guys. I gotta go.”

“Why?” Richie said as he sat down next to Eddie on the couch, “Got a hot date?”

“No, my dad is gonna be pissed the fuck off if I’m not home five minutes ago.” She said.

Richie got that unnoticeable sad look on his face. Well, unnoticeable to _almost_ everyone. “Ok, do what you gotta do, y’know?”

She sighed. “Sorry. You know how he gets.”

“Yeah, I know. Call me if you need anything.”

“Thanks, Rich.” She smiled sadly and stood up. “Feel better, Eddie.”

Eddie smiled softly at her as she left the house. Suddenly, Bill walked back into the room.

“Here, take t-two of these.” Bill said, throwing Eddie the bottle of pills and handing him a glass of water. Eddie poured out two pills and popped them in his mouth, adding a large gulp of water to the mix and audibly swallowed. All of a sudden, a phone started to ring. The three boys pulled their phones out, but Eddie and Richie’s were both silent.

“_Shit._” Bill said. He stood up from his kneeling position as he answered the phone. 

“Hey, Dad. I-I wasn’t looking at the t-t-time. Sorry. I’ll come n-now. Ok, bye.” Bill hung up the phone and looked up. “My dad is being f-fucking annoying. I gotta go.”

“Ok. See you later, man.” Richie said, waving to him as he walked out the door.

Eddie knew the clock was ticking. His mother would kill him if he wasn’t back by curfew. But somehow, he didn’t care much. He felt good here, almost safe. And he hated it. He wasn’t supposed to feel like this, he should hate Richie for being such a fucking dumbass all the time. But he couldn’t. Not anymore.

But alas, he would never say it. And he would keep treating him like he hated him.

The two boys sat in silence for a little bit. A few minutes, at least, it was awkwardly dead silent.

“Richie?”

“Yeah?” Richie said innocently.

Eddie froze for a second. He didn’t know how to say this without coming on too strong or sounding weird because they aren’t close let alone even friends for that matter, but he just wanted to ask so bad- he almost _needed_ to ask it. It was tugging at him, like a drug addict going through withdrawals, he needed his fix.

“Can you sing me a song?”

Richie smiled. “A song?”

“Yeah.”

“What song?”

“Any song you want, whatever you feel belongs to the moment.”

“Oh, come one Eddie bear, don’t get all cheesy on me like that.”

But alas, he stood up and walked over to the guitar still sitting in the same spot it was the night of the party. He picked it up and took it to where he was sitting on the couch. It took him half a minute to think on it, but then decided a good song for the mood.

“_Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh_” He carried on two more times. “_And I've been looking for someone to put up with my bullshit. I can't even leave my bedroom so I keep pouring. And I ain't seen a light of day since, well, that's not important, it's been long._” Richie started to feel consumed in the music as he sang on. He often felt like this when he sang.

“_And I was feeling Whitney, me and my homies sip Houston. Cars and clothes, thought I was winning, you knew I was losing. You told me to wake up, oh, my clock always stays on snooze, I'm done._” As the words left his mouth, he could feel the warmth spreading inside him. Singing was something so personal to Richie, it made the entire world slip away. Like, no matter what was going on, whatever trouble he was in with his parents or with school, playing music and singing a tune could make it all disappear in a few words.

“_To each their own and find peace in knowing. Ain't always broken, but here's to hoping. Show no emotion, against your coding, just act as hard as you can. You don't need a friend, boy, you're the man._” Richie could relate to this one a lot, which is why and how he had learned it as fast as he did. His entire life, Richie was always weary about who he was, and he still didn’t know. His anxiety pushed every good thought out of his head. He constantly worried and wondered about any and everything- if his friends really liked him, how long before he was kicked out of school, how long before his parents finally kicked him out. He knows none of this would ever happen- well, maybe the school one, but either way, he couldn’t help but question his whole life and whether or not everything or everyone around him was really there with him.

“_And I've been looking for someone that I can buy my drugs from_” Eddie laughed at that one, making Richie smile. “_It seems like every plug ran east to Utah, became Mormons. Drought comes around, feels like I have no one to depend on sober, ugh_”

These lyrics hit a little closer to home for Richie. He’s had his fair share of drugs in his life. But it seems a lot of his friends from all these parties and such have recovered or just grown to get sick of Richie begging for stuff. Richie had grown used to it, though. He hated feeling sober. He was right now, of course. But he hated _feeling_. Just all the emotions that came when he wasn’t drunk or high on anything he could get his hands on, he couldn’t stand as they were never good. He never felt good. Only sometimes, when he was with the right people or person.

“_I had 80 beers on Tuesday night, I had nothing to do with it. I put on a little Dwight and sang a happy tune and lit a cigarette, stepped out the door, had an appearance, drank more._” That first lyric reminded Eddie of the party. He wondered if Richie had been drunk that night and was just really good at hiding it, or if for something he actually stayed sober at a time when being drunk was appropriate.

“_To each their own and find peace in knowing, ain't always broken, but here's to hoping, show no emotion, against your coding. Just act as hard as you can. You don't need a friend, boy, you're the man_” He sang again. Eddie wondered how this song processed in Richie’s mind. Certain songs meant things to people, and he wondered if this one meant as much to Richie as Eddie thought it did.

“_Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh._” Richie finished. Eddie was falling asleep, the pain-killers must’ve knocked him out. Richie could see his eyes fluttering open and shut, hanging half closed.

“You can sleep if you’re tired, Eds.” Richie said.

“No, no I’m, uh, I’m not tired.” Eddie said yawning. He felt his eyes start to close. “I’m just gonna, uh, rest my eyes, y’know?”

“Oh, yeah.” Richie said with a smirk.

* * *

Eddie woke up to the smell of cigarettes. He thought his back would be killing him after sleeping on a couch, but surprisingly he felt ok. Then he sat up and realized he wasn’t sitting on the couch. He was in a bed. _When did I get here?_ He asked himself.

He heard yelling coming from the other room before footsteps walking towards him. He rubbed his eyes. _What time is it?_ He wondered. The door opened and slammed shut as Richie walked in and sighed. He opened his eyes. They got huge.

“Shit, I totally forgot you were here.” He said moving closer to the bed.

“Wow, thanks.” He said, sarcastically hurt by his words. “What time is it?”

“It’s…” Richie looked down at the watch on his wrist. “Almost 10:45.”

Eddies eyes shot open as he frantically got out of bed. “I was supposed to be home forty-five minutes ago.” He picked up his phone and turned it on. _7 missed calls from Mom._ it read.

From, Mom: _Where are you?_

From, Mom: _Eddie pick up the phone._

From, Mom: _CALL ME, NOW_

He dialed her number quickly.

“Eddie, you better have a damn good explanation for this. Curfew was forty-five minutes ago, where in God’s name are you?”

“Sorry, Mom, I forgot to tell you. I’m sleeping at Stan’s house tonight.” Eddie explained.

“Oh, no, you’re not. Get home, _NOW._”

“Ok. Love you.” He hung up with a sigh. “I have to go.”

“Good, saves me an explanation to my parents as to why a random boy is sleeping in my room.”

Eddie rolled his eyes. Richie was being a little rude, but he tried to remind himself that Richie is always like this. But for some reason, he wasn’t always like this. Not anymore. Maybe Eddie was wrong. Maybe he was still the same trashmouth he always was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so fucking sorry that this is so short and took so long, school is kicking my ass but i'll try to keep updating


	9. as the rain pours down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think you guys will enjoy this one ;)

When Eddie’s mom had gotten the call out his suspension from another fight, she lost her mind. Screaming was under-exaggerating it. Which made Eddie start fuming with anger. None of this would have happened if it wasn’t for Richie and his stupid temper. His mother was mad at him, his head was still pounding and ringing, and not a single text from Richie. No texts, no calls, nothing. It was like he went from giving him medical attention and supporting him for what Eddie did for him, and then, like turning off a light switch, he just stopped caring.

“I don’t care anyways. It doesn’t matter. Can we talk about something else now?”

“What do you wanna talk about then?” Stan asked.

“Literally anything else. How was school. What did you learn. Fucking _anything_.” Eddie said with wide eyes. They all went quiet. “Wait.”

“What?” Ben asked.

“Where the hell is Mike?” Eddie asked.

“Yeah, where is he?” Ben agreed and asked. They looked at Stan.

“Why are you looking at me?” They stared harder.

“Fine. He told me he wanted to stay home, but I have my suspicions.”

“What suspicions?” Ben said, confused as to what he could possibly be talking about.

“I think he’s with Bill.”

“Bill… DENBROUGH?” Eddie asked.

“Yes.”

“What the fuck- call him.”

Stan pulled out his phone and dialed the number.

“_Hey Mike. Yeah, no. Just wanted to make sure everything’s ok. Is there someone with you? Then who’s talking in the background? Whatever you say man. Ok, bye._” Stan hung up the phone.

“So?”

“_So,_ I could hear him trying not to laugh, and someone else in the background who he claims was just the TV.”

“So, check his location on snap.” Eddie said.

Stan moved quick on his phone. “He turned it off.”

“That motherfucker.” Eddie said.

“Who, Bill?” Stan asked.

“Well, yes. But fucking Richie. If he didn’t make us go to his stupid fucking party, they never would have gotten along, and Mike wouldn’t be a secret little pothead. He’s a life-ruiner.”

“Relax, Eddie. It’s not that big of a deal. Just forget about him. He doesn’t matter anyways.” Stan said.

_Just forget about him._

* * *

Richie looked in the mirror. His face was dripping after hitting it with water from the sink. He put on his glasses and walked back into his room before sitting on his bed. He took a box of cigarettes out of his nightstand drawer and pulled one out. He picked up his lighter before sighing and putting his head in his hands, still holding the cigarette and lighter. He took a deep breath and walked over to his window. His parents cars were gone, per usual. Opening the door to the backyard, Richie walked out and sat in one of the chairs on the patio. He lit the cigarette and took a deep inhale. He closed his eyes.

Richie did this often. He lit a cigarette and tried to imagine he was in a different world. He pictured himself and some other faceless person walking along a bridge, hands together, happy. Just happy. He didn’t have anyone in mind, because in real life he knew that no one cared about him the way he longs for someone to _really_ care about him.

But he didn’t care. Or at least, he pretended not to care. He knew he cared. But caring wasn’t something he wanted people to know he could do. He liked his reputation. People liked him. They thought he was funny. Some people were even scared of him. Maybe there were certain people who didn’t like him, like how a lot of the girls found him annoying and rude. But he could live with that. What he loved most of all, though, were people who thought he was cool. He fit-in. And that’s all he ever wanted to do. Isn’t that what everyone wants in high school?

Everyone puts on their brave faces and pretends not to care what others think. Richie often sees things all over snapchat and instagram about _”being your true self”_ and _“not caring about what people think”_, but he knew it was all bullshit. Of course he cared. Everyone cares. Most people care in secret, but they still care. That’s the teenage dream- fitting-in. Being liked. And now that Richie has his place as this _“cool guy”_, he feels the need to uphold his reputation. He doesn’t want to let some kid like Eddie walking around with him and ruining that.

Richie picked up his phone. He went to Eddie’s contact in his phone and scrolled down. He hit the last button. _Block this number_. He slammed his phone down on the table. He didn’t bother to check if it had cracked because in this moment, he could not have cared less.

He felt a tear slip down his cheek. _Why the fuck am I crying?_ He asked himself. He quickly wiped it away and took another drag of his cigarette. He sucked up the snot in his nose that ran down with the tears.

“_Fuck._”

But he couldn’t stop it. He caught his breath after a second and thought more. He tried to imagine _this_ world being better. His parents actually staying home for longer than a few days at the same time. People thinking more of him than some cool stoner kid who doesn’t give a shit. A world where he _actually_ didn’t give a shit. He’d like that. He’d like that a lot.

But alas, this world was this world. And he knew he couldn’t change it. But it just made Richie regret a lot more things than he used to.

* * *

Once Stan and Ben had left, Eddie was left alone to think. He couldn’t take it anymore. He was a sucker. He pulled out his phone and types out a message. A simple _“hey”_. But it wouldn’t send. He tried again. Didn’t work. Eddie had clicked the send button so many times he didn’t realize he was holding his breath until he let out a huge sigh.

“_What the fuck?_” He breathed out.

He threw his phone and slammed his head down into the pillow. He slammed it another few times before he noticed the ringing getting slightly louder. He stopped.

Why was he mad? He was mad at Richie. Hell, he was fucking _furious_. So why did he give a shit that Richie blocked him.

_I should be the one blocking him, that stupid fuckface._

Eddie stood up. He grabbed his phone which had a new single crack running along the screen. He stomped off. Thank God his mother wasn’t home, she would have questioned the hell out of him.

Eddie knew it was cold but he didn’t care. He opened the door and stormed out.

* * *

It was dark out by the time Eddie reached Richie’s house. When he left, the sun had already started setting. The walk, or run in Eddie’s case, wasn’t too far from his own rinky-dink house. About fifteen minutes walking, but ten running. When he got there, he didn’t even care enough to get to the door and knock. He stopped to try and catch his breath.

“RICHIE!” He screamed out. “RICHIE!”

He kept screaming as raindrops started falling down. He realized he had forgotten his inhaler and started to feel his breath get heavier and heavier.

“RICHIE!” He screamed one last time before the boy himself walked out of the front door.

“WHAT?” Richie yelled back. He started walking to Eddie who was standing in the street. Richie stood at the curb. The rain started coming down hard.

“You think, that you, are one, _sly_ motherfucker, huh?” He said, gasping.

“Eddie, breathe.”

“Shut up. For once in your fucking life, Richie, shut the fuck up you stupid fucking trashmouth.” He said harshly. Richie went dead silent.

“You think you can just walk into my life like that? Really? And then make me feel all cool, all special, invite me to your party, all that shit. Fuck, Richie! I got my fucking head slammed into a statue for you! And what do you do? You fucking _block me._ I don’t know if you knew this, but most people wouldn’t be such a fucking dumbass like that. You make me feel all these stupid feelings, and then throw me out like trash. Your parents come home, and you dispose of me like trash. You had me crawl out the fucking window! You make me feel things that no one has ever made me feel before in my life, and you don’t even realize! You just treat me like some fucking idiot when in reality- I’m the smart one! You are such a fucking dick and you don’t even realize it, do you? Fuck you, Richie Tozier. Holy shit I can’t fucking breathe-”

And then time froze. The rain had froze in its place. Richie had walked over to Eddie, grabbed his face mid-rant, and smacked their lips together. And they kissed. For a few seconds, the world had stopped.

“What the fuck?” Eddie said, breaking them apart.

“I-I’m sorry, I don’t know what-”

“Richie. Shut the fuck up.” And with a small smile, he pulled Richie in again.

And he kissed him again. Richie holding Eddie’s cheeks, Eddie squeezing Richie’s arms, and both of their lips touching to form one time-stopping kiss. And another, and another, and another one after that. His hands started running through Richie’s hair as they passionately kissed in the middle of the street under the pouring rain.

Richie grabbed Eddie’s hand and pulled him into a run. They ran into Richie’s house and he closed the front door. Sopping wet, they started making-out again as they laughed and stumbled into Richie’s bedroom. Richie started to take Eddie’s shirt off, and Eddie didn’t stop him.

“Wait- aren’t your parents home?”

“Nope, out of town.”

They kissed again as Richie pushed Eddie down on his bed and took his shirt off. They both started to undress completely.

“Are you sure about this, Eds?” He said, breathlessly.

“Hey, Richie?”

“Yeah?”

“Shut up.”

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoy this, updates might be slow from school but i'll try my best to pump out chapters whenever i can :)


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